i am perfectly fine with having other people sit on my lap but i can’t sit on other people’s laps because i’m always paranoid that i’d crush them and they’d diE
"We’re preparing you for the real world"
I don’t meant to alarm you but
the real world has calculators
sharing an umbrella with someone seems cute but in practice it is 100% horrible and you both end up getting angry and wet
i have money. i can drive.. i can get myself an entire thing of cupcakes right now…
no one man should have all that power
me: *swats at fly*
fly: i came out to have a good time and i’m honestly feeling so attacked right now
There’s an abundance of bad things happening right now, and it’s hard not to be sucked into that black hole of sadness, so let’s have a puppy party shall we.
Because, let’s face it, dogs never grow up.
ADDED BONUS, PUPS IN MOTION!!!
side effects of being friends with me include gaining extensive knowledge of bands you dont listen to or care about
Having a pet is so weird. Like neither of you speak each other’s language and yet you form some strong bond by rubbing against each other and sleeping together and you might accidentally kick them in the face or step on their tail once in a while but at the end of the day you two are best buddies from entirely different species.